Skeleton is ordered to assume the position!

Assume the position!
In the above illustration, a bony skeleton has been ordered to assume a vulnerable position.

Even rattling old skeletons can be trained to obey your commands. You just need to be assertive.

Click the following link to check out how you can see a skeleton kneel obediently and assume the position.  It’s amazingly easy!

Become as a snail and ascend glistening slime.

As a snail, ascend the glistening path of slime. Gautama Buddha
As a snail, ascend the glistening path of slime.  Gautama Buddha

Deepest wisdom is a profoundly motivating spark that our dull, conventional minds sorely need. Sayings that are both elevating and sublime are exceptionally hard to find.

After a good deal of research on the internet, I’m happy to report I’ve uncovered a wise saying that you might want to ponder, and perhaps even memorize. You’ll find it in the inspiring image above.

Here is my source.

Sharks have real feelings, including sadness.

This shark is feeling very sad at the moment. That's quite obvious.
This shark is feeling very sad at the moment. That’s quite obvious.

I have absolute photographic proof that certain ravenous, cold-blooded eating machines are in fact very sensitive creatures. You might want to give this sad shark a great big loving hug. I’m sure you’ll be touched.

Like this confused cat, you might ask: Why me?

Like this confused cat, you might ask: Why me?
Like this confused cat, you might ask: Why me?

Another day, another calamity. Such is life.

I’m happy to see I’m not the only one who feels confused, horrified and dumbfounded. The perpetually absurd situations that I find myself in might be explained by this crazy website.

Stand by for more silly animals!

Something smells funny here. I nose it.

Have a question? Take a look at my honest face. I nose it.
You want to be my friend. I nose it.

Yes. I’m forced to be perfectly honest. This is the first post of my amazing, astonishing Absolutely Bizarre Humor blog!

In the weeks ahead, please feel free to come nosing around. Weirdness will abound. You will be dazzled, dumbfounded and dismayed.  You’ll smell something’s up.

While you anticipate the coming absurdities, please check out the above crazy design in my very funny gift shop …I nose you’ll like it!

Some very odd stuff that might make you laugh.

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